When did you tell people you were pregnant (previous loss ment.)?

(6 posts)(6 voices)
  1. Hi ladies,

    First of all, congrats to all of you for being here!

    Secondly, when did you feel safe to tell people you were pregnant?

    I am 14 weeks 1 day pregnant with fraternal twins. I get to have weekly ultrasounds because I have a hematoma and I am still bleeding/spotting every few days. The hematoma is now way smaller than the babies, so I hope it's a good sign. Also, this pregnancy started out with quads, but we lost identical twins at 8 weeks (their heartbeats stopped). The sac with identicals is still in my uterus right above the hematoma between the live twins. So I have a lot going on in my uterus. We had an NT scan and both babies looked great. However, according to my OBGYN, I still have 10% chance of miscarrying my babies because of the hematoma and the other sac.

    I had two m/c prior to this -- lost triplets after hearing their heartbeats at 6.5 weeks and then had a blighted ovum pregnancy that I m/c at 7.5 weeks. This is the furthest I've ever made it in pregnancy. Also, I am 34 but I used donor eggs and my donor is 27, has a child of her own and has produced two singelton pregnancies at my clinic.

    I am so paranoid about telling people I am pregnant, yet I really want to share the news with some close friends! So far we've told only my mom and siblings, two couples that we are close with, and one girlfriend. I am showing a little now, so it will be hard to hide my pregnancy much longer.

    Thanks for listening,

    Kite

  2. Hey Kite~ my first pg I waited until 12 weeks to tell most people other than immediate family. I just didn't want to jinx it. That one turned out to be a full term baby boy with no complications with the pg or labor and delivery. This time around, I am pg with twins and told everyone right away. I knew it was a bit risky in doing it but I also knew that telling people wouldn't cause me to miscarry. Given the history of my one and only pg, I felt good sharing the news. That being said, we found out it was twins at 8/9 weeks and after sharing it with everyone, I couldn't wait to pass the 12 week mark to feel safer. I just passed the 28 week point which makes me breathe a bigger sigh. I think we are nervous no matter the history and a bit paranoid. Of course some more than others. Share the news when you are ready for all that comes with it. The excitement and anxiety can be overwhelming. I wish you a wonderful twin pg. Sounds like you really deserve it after all you have been through.

    ~susan

  3. When I was pg with my girls, twins, (from IVF#6, also started out as triplets), I told almost no one. It took so long to get pg, and the pg was rather difficult. I also had several losses, including a 20 week loss, so I just didn't feel good about sharing before the 20 week mark. Once I got there, I was having lots of uterine irritablity and was very scared. I also don't have a good relationship with my parents/family, and since I moved I am not close in distance to many of my friends. So, I figured if they don't see me (I was bedresting alot) then why tell-- really HATE when people gush! Most people found out, AFTER I gave birth. Those that were happy for us, didn't really care and understood why I kep it a secret. Good luck and do what feels good to you.

  4. I told my parents early on b/c I was put on bed rest and couldn't do much. I told extended family around 14 weeks, but not about having twins. They found out about that when they got the baby shower invite, about 1 month before delivering. GL to you!

  5. Hi Kite,

    We are expecting via GS -23 weeks - and we plan on telling DH's husband this weekend at almost 24 weeks. This will be the first family that knows. My work knows only because I had to give notice for maternity leave. Otherwise just my 2 bestfriends. I think I will tell my parents next month, at 28 weeks or so - but my mother is HIGH HIGH maintenance.

  6. We told at 10 wks I think. I was soo bloated and it was my third pg so it was getting hard to hide. Most people knew by then, it was the elephant in the room. My first pg ended early m/c and everyone knew. I prefer the support if something goes wrong so I told early again for second pg. My twin pg was so filled with emotions early on that I needed to wait to come to terms with it before I told anyone other than family and close friends who would understand my feelings and not judge me.

    Congrats on your pg

    Dena

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