Twin\'s mom and work

(13 posts)(9 voices)
  1. After 4 long years of TTC and IF treatment, we are finally pregnant! With twins! We are very happy and grateful!

    We just had our first peri/OB appointment. Our peri told us because I'm pregnant with twins, I'm going to stop working at 26 weeks to avoid potential issues. Having worked so hard for this pregnancy, I'm going to do whatever our peri told me to.

    I know at my work, the FMLA leave is 12 weeks. Anything after 12 weeks, I'm not garanteed my job back. I originally intended to go back to work part time after the babies are here, but now it looks like they can deny me because for sure, I will be on leave for more than 12 weeks. Also I will not go back to work 40 hours a week.

    I'm wondering what you all did with your twin pregnancy? Did you all quit working after the babies arrive? DH wants me to be happy and do what I want, and financially we are ok if I quit work for a while.

    Thank you in advance!

  2. I haven't met with my peri/ob. Last Tuesday my twins measure 8w2days.....

    I haven't planned a darned thing. I am a school teacher, so I don't know what we are going to do. I don't have much sick leave left are IVF treatment. But I was hoping that I will go close to full term and give birth close to my Christmas/New Years break...

    We are so stunned that we haven't thought about much else besides getting through the next few months...

    Two of everything...

  3. congrats to both of you !
    The work thing is so hard to figure out, esp not really knowing what will happen with twins, etc...

    My plan is to go back (I can take off for about 4 months though, I'm very lucky) as of now. I don't know what will happen of course, so I know maybe it won't work out, but that is my plan! I have a pretty flexible job & likely will not need a full time care provider though, maybe 3 days a week on average.

    Regarding staying home, I also teach so my school year ends at 23 weeks- I was supposed to teach a little this summer but declined that, so it worked out. I don't think my OB has a certain # of weeks that he requests people stop working but he did ask a lot of questions about when my school year ended in the beginning to gauge how far along I'd be. I think it depends on how things are progressing for him & what type of job you do though. I know a lot of women work pretty far into their third tri, even with 'on their feet' types of jobs like nursing. I'm not sure how they do it!

    GL with everything !!!

  4. Hi

    It probably depends on your work place and you boss.

    I am 34w6d with twins. I have been off work since 18w. I ran out of FMLA protection March 30th. I am an RN and where I work, they can post my job now. I am on a non-fmla medical leave until June 22nd, then I have to convert over to a personal leave of abscense. Where I work, it is up to the manager discrection to keep your position for you. If they choose to fill it while you are gone, you just get whats open when you come back. Luckily I have a pretty good boss, plus it helps that I have been there a long time and it is hard to keep people, it looks like I will get my position back.

    I have a planned c/s on May 15th and plan on staying off until July 31st. So I will end up being off close to 7 months. I have to go back as I am the insurance carrier, but I only plan on going back 2 days a week.

    So my advice would be to be upfront with your intentions feel out your manager and see what they think about it. If they would be receptive to you coming back part time and taking up to 6 months off. I was very up front about it. I knew very early on that I would be going off work at 18w and would be out the whole time. So my boss was prepared and has worked it into everything else.

    The most important thing would be to not worry about it, what will be, will be. Plus it sounds like your DH is very supportive, which helps out tremedously.



  5. Thank you ladies for the good wishes and suggestions. The more the merrier!

    I\'ve only been at my work for 1 year. I like my job so far, and people are nice. I received very good reviews recently, so I think I'm doing a decent job so far.

    But because I'm only there for a year, I have very few sick days. Between the IVF and doctor's appointments, I don't expect to have much sick days left by the time I need the maternity leave.

    I agree with you I need to be upfront about my plans. I'm going to talk to them as soon as I'm out of the first trimester so that we can start to plan. I hope they will be accomendating, but if they are not, I understand too. I will be out for 6 months, then come back part time.

    For stay-at-home moms, do you like staying home? Plenty to do (I know this sounds like such a stupid question!)? I'm worried about staying home full time because I got so bored when I took a day off and stayed home by myself occassionally. But of course once the twins are here, everything will change! For the better!

  6. I work at a small non-profit and with my salary I'd have to get a second job just to make up for what daycare for two would cost. Everyone told me not to tell them I was leaving, but I didn't want to leave them without a replacement. They are looking for someone PT to do part of what I do now, then split the rest with the staff (budget cuts).

    I have to say, I'm wondering if I did the right thing - but I think they needed to start making plans and I wanted to do what was right. I'm 23 wks and one of the things I told my director was that my main concern on telling of my plans so soon was that if I lose the pg I don't want to be without my job, too. They are hoping to get the p/t replacement in soon, which makes me wonder what happens if the worst does happen? I try not to think that way, but can't seem to help it...

    Anyone else going back and forth with this sort of thing?

    After paying some IVF expenses, I started pretending that my paycheck didn't exist so we could start to acclimate.

    I'd also be interesting in hearing from others who stayed at home. It seems like a HUGE transition if you are used to working outside the home.

    Good luck to everyone figuring this stuff out!

  7. llllllllllllllllllllllllllll

  8. I haven't had my twins yet (28 weeks pg) but I am definitely going back to work. I am the primary breadwinner in our house so there's no way we could make it on DH's salary alone. Plus, I like my job a lot and want to go back.

    As for the leave thing - I just went out on leave at 26 weeks and am in the same boat with FMLA. Mine expires right before my actual due date. I have a tiny bit of trepidation around it but am hoping my ~14 years with this company is worth something to them to keep me around. There's always doubt though, especially since I work from home instead of in the office (the office is three states away from me).

    Anyway - my overall theory on these things is that they always work themselves out. I can sit around and be nervous about it for the next five months or I can just let the chips fall where they may.

    Good luck with your twin pg and your decisions!

  9. Anyway - my overall theory on these things is that they always work themselves out. I can sit around and be nervous about it for the next five months or I can just let the chips fall where they may. Good luck with your twin pg and your decisions!

    I hear you on that Jill! Things will work out one way or another. My task right now is to take care of growing these babies!

  10. Do you have FMLA by your state as well? I'm in NJ, and our STATE FMLA doesn't start until after birth ... So I was able to take my full 12 weeks after the birth of my twins ... in fact, I was able to take it AFTER my disability ended ... so I had 8 weeks off (because of c-secition) and then an additional 12 weeks because of NJ State FMLA.

    My HR rep at my work explained it all to me, but maybe check with your state to make sure you aren't entitled to more than just the federal FMLA.

  11. I would also recommend looking into your FMLA and disability coverage. When I had to stop working at 29 weeks, I found out that I have short term disability that covers both my bed rest and 8 weeks post delivery if I have c-section (6 weeks for vaginal delivery). My FMLA does not kick in until after the 6-8 weeks disability post delivery.

    I am not sure how much this varies by state and/or by employer, but it's definitely worth looking into!

  12. It varies a ton by state. I live in WA state and FMLA is concurrent with short-term disability, so my FMLA protection will run out before I even deliver.

  13. I know several states have state disability plans, such as NJ, NY, CA and RI. But I live in Ohio, and FMLA is concurrent with short-term disability. So, for my case, like in Jill's, my FMLA protection will run out before my due date (26 weeks off work, plus 12 weeks FMLA, my protection runs out at 38 weeks, and I may not even deliver the babies yet by then!).

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