thinking about going it alone

(6 posts)(6 voices)
  1. Deleted **************

  2. Children, while loved and wanted, also can put stress on even the best relationships. If you're going to stay in your marriage, it may be better to get counseling before cycling.

    Good luck to you and your husband.

  3. From my experience, I think you should resolve your marriage. Please don't think a child will bring you and your husband closer, this thought was my mistake. Also, when you have a child, it would be more complicated. Don't drag a child in the situation. It's hard to start a new life, but when you think back you are happy with your decision.
    Good luck to you.

  4. paschalia,
    I am in a similar situation. My husband and I are considering divorce for many reasons but mainly on our views of wanting to have a child. Money has always been his reason for "wanting to wait". Our marriage has grown very distant during this waiting time, as I think he is just stalling and won't ever commit. The health insurance in my new position includes infertility benefits so there wasn't a huge financial burden expected. However in March he was fired from his job. I am tired of waiting and the clinic in town will treat single women. I'm considering treatment alone but wonder how selfish I am being. It is a huge emotional decision to make. I'm also looking for advice. Best wishes paschalia.

  5. I found out at 41yo that my insurance would cover IVF. My partner at the time (of 7 years) wasn't sure she wanted kids...liked the freedom of our childless lifestyle. I decided I was going to move forward anyway. Seven months later, I got pregnant with my DD at 41.5yo (after 2M/Cs and a neg). My relationship ended when I was 32 weeks pregnant. (although she left for a woman with 3 kids) Anyway, I am SO GLAD I decided to move forward when I did. I did 6 more IVFs with my own eggs after my DD was born (I started again when she was 3 months old, exactly 1 year from my previous success). Never got anything but blighted ovums. I am now pregnant with twins from donor egg. I am in the midst of another break-up, with a relationship that is less than a year old. It is difficult to go thru when pregnant, but not the end of the world. I would say at your age, if you want the chance for a biological child, don't wait. I was amazed at how much my fertility changed in just 1 year.

  6. Hello ladies,

    Im kinda in the same boat...<br /><br />I want a baby and so is my DH but he doesnt wanna hear about adopted embies while he doesnt even have the $ for nothing as he doesnt have a job!<br /><br />Hes not getting along with my 12y.o DS and its all getting worse but I still want a baby more than anything else in the world,I know Im not young,47,but I look and feel 20 years younger and nothing can stop me from going for IVF so now Im not sure what to do,I guess we`ll need to go to counseling as well...

    Grrrr,why is it so complicated?Why men are so complicated I should say!!

    Good luck to all!


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