Spin off: If you kept your maiden name, what last name do your children have?

(19 posts)(15 voices)
  1. So, spinning off of Brandi's poll about what last name you have, if you and DH have different last names, what name(s) do your children go by?

  2. I hyphenated my name and as I said on the other thread if I had to do it again, I would have just kept my name. DD has DH's name. I'm ok with the theory that everyone takes the name of their father, I'm just not ok with having to change my name after 30 years simply because I got married.

    Stephanie

  3. I like exactly how you put that.

  4. I still have my maiden name, but DD has DH's last name. My mother refuses to address things to my name and always writes: "Mrs. Hubby's First Name Hubby's Last Name!"

    I don't mind it if somoene calls me by my husband's last name.

  5. I didn't do this, but read this suggestion in an article a long time ago: that women should keep their maiden name and all male children have the dh's last name and female children have the dw last name. I thought that was kind of a cool idea.

  6. I don't mind if people call me by DH's last name either, and sometimes use it when it might be easier (i.e. appts with the auto mechanic - super easy last name and he writes in an appt book, doesn't keep computer accts).

    I can see where there could be issues though, i.e. traveling alone with DS to a different country, with having different last names. BTW, I find the whole need a notorized note showing you are the parent thing crazy, not in a bad way, but just in that I traveled a lot with my grandma and my uncle and no one ever questioned it because we had the same last name, but neither was my legal guardian. DS's last name is extremely common, so even though I don't share his last name, a countless number of people not related to him do, so to assume he belongs with someone just on last name alone blows my mind.

  7. DDs have DH's last name. (I kept my maiden name)

  8. I commented in another thread (busy morning, Rach! ) that my DS's have my last name as their second middle name, then DH's last name as their last name. So while I voted in the first category, it's a little more complicated than that.

  9. I changed my name for DH#1&2. After that, I changed it back to maiden name with last divorce. Since this also required new lining in my fur coat to change the monogram, I kept my name with DH#3<smile>. Rat Man ( DH#3 ) was going to change his name after some legal stuff was over. He never did but all DC have my last name. Since Rat Man bailed out, it has worked quite well<smile>. it actually has caused issues, nothing major, since married women's children have DH's last name, don'tchaknow. Vital Statistics even called me thinking I had checked the wrong box for DS#1. I had to send a certified copy of marriage lic to them to get births of DS#4 &5 registered.

    danai

  10. I kept my maided name. DS has my husband's last name. I love my last name, but it is very Italian, no one can pronounce or spell it right and it doesn't really fit as a middle name otherwise I probably would have considered giving my maiden name to DS as a middle name.

    "Mrs. Hubby's First Name Hubby's Last Name!"
    My husband's family does this and it drives me up the frickin wall. I have always felt like this makes the wife sound like her husband's property. I guess I am very sensitive to it. I got married when I was 29. Had my degrees, my career, and my money before I even met my husband. I am not anyone's Mrs. something something. Ok. Off my soapbox. I am too emotionally invested in this topic right now.

  11. I commented in another thread (busy morning, Rach! ) that my DS's have my last name as their second middle name, then DH's last name as their last name. So while I voted in the first category, it's a little more complicated than that.

    same here. i didn't change my name when i married dh #2, but dh #1 and i both hyphenated when we got married. we considered hyphenating ds #1's name, but it's a real tongue twister so we didn't.

  12. Kept my name. DC have DH's last name. I always knew this is how I would want it -- for a good reason that now sounds kind of sad/pessimistic: Having my dad's last name served as "proof" that he was my dad when I was growing up (my parents split up when I was little). Since you always "know" who the mom is, I wanted my kids to have that too. Now that sounds like I expect to divorce. Certainly hope not to!

    fabio

  13. I kept my maiden name and our children have my name and my husband's last name as their last name - it's not hyphenated, though (I wanted to hyphenate them, but DH wouldn't agree, and it was hard enough getting him to agree that the children would have both last names).

    Sasha

  14. I didn't take DH last name because it was too long, dificult to pronounce and spell. DH didn't seem to mind it but when it came time to name the kids he voiced that it was important for him that they had his last name. They were born premature, in the hospital they were knowned by my last name so I complied.

  15. My husband's family does this and it drives me up the frickin wall. I have always felt like this makes the wife sound like her husband's property. I guess I am very sensitive to it. I got married when I was 29. Had my degrees, my career, and my money before I even met my husband. I am not anyone's Mrs. something something. Ok. Off my soapbox. I am too emotionally invested in this topic right now.
    Ditto +++++
    The only one who does it to me is my twice divorced, 5 time name changing mother.

    Edited to say: Charilebo is refering to people writing to you as Mrs John Smith.
    Not taking Mrs Smith

  16. I kept my maiden name. My boys carry both names of their parents. I usually don't like the hyphenated names but I love it that it reflects that the boys are from the two of us.
    This was only possible because I have the British nationality, too. The boys also have it even thought they can't pass it on to their children.
    Germans are really weird with family names. They would not have allowed what we have now plus they insisted on spelling on of my boys' names with a c instead of a k. Thanks to British laws this has been taken care off, too.
    Apple

  17. I still have my maiden name, but DD has DH's last name. My mother refuses to address things to my name and always writes: "Mrs. Hubby's First Name Hubby's Last Name!"

    mine, too. drives me up the wall- that's not my name- i have a phd and support our entire family- and i'm supposed to be his property somehow? i think not.

    plus my mother says that that's better than if she did mrs. myfirstname hislastname- b/c that would mean i'm a widow. she lives in 1935, my mother

  18. I wanted to but decided to take hubby's last name and move my maiden name into my middle name.

  19. Quote:
    plus my mother says that that's better than if she did mrs. myfirstname hislastname- b/c that would mean i'm a widow. she lives in 1935, my mother

    omg, pilma, your mom is a piece of work!
    I get letters addressed to aniela DH's last name from my family, both immediate and extended. I have told my family numerous times that I did not take DH's name, but no one seems to be listening.

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