Hold me back

(116 posts)(34 voices)
  1. I want to slap this beeyotch in a big way. Positive thinking will get me a child, apparently.

    thefertilityadvocate.com

  2. or a red velvet cupcake.

  3. She says, "but I do believe that we can want something so badly that if we put our whole self into our desires, and open to the “idea” of what we want instead of how it is suppose to happen (the specific paths and outcome) - that our dreams can come true. "

    First of all, what's up with the grammar? Second of all, she sounds like a nutter. Nothing she says makes any sense. She basically says that you don't need a plan, you just have to know what you want. But she had her kids via IVF. Did she not PLAN on doing IVF? Did it just somehow happen that her eggs were accidentally retrieved and fertilized and embryos were placed in her uterus all while she was just daydreaming about having a baby and a cupcake? Amazing!

    You know, I think I'll just start wishing for a million dollars. No, make that ten million. Since I don't actually need a plan and just have to want it bad enough, I better get started, right?

  4. This woman is the founder of the AFA and currently she is the "patient education director" of East Coast Fertility! Does she tell the patients that they'll surely have babies if they just have a positive facking attitude???

    Please consider leaving comments on her blog.

    I am raging ****** off at this. This is a fertility educator f'chrissakes. She should know better.

  5. This woman is the founder of the AFA and currently she is the "patient education director" of East Coast Fertility!

    OMG OMG OMG. That's my old RE office. You know, it started getting weird right before I left. I liked Dr. Kreiner, but he had this wellness center which started out as just acupuncture which was right in the office. And you could get a massage while you were waiting for monitoring. Sounds nice, right? Well, he fired my acupuncurist who I happened to love (and continued to see in her private practice) and hired this AWFUL woman who would sit in the waiting room and recruit new clients. On three separate occasions she asked what I was there for and proceeded to give me advice about how to increase my fertility. Unsolicited advice and a whole lot of BS if you ask me. She never remembered me from one time to the next and on my final visit (when I found out that my 3rd IVF there resulted in all of my frozen embryos dying in the thaw) I snapped and told her that I was never coming back and please stop speaking to me. The receptionist could tell I was upset and shuffled me out of the waiting room, put me in a private room, apologized for the rude and intrusive woman and confided that no one liked her. Now I see he's got this wackadoo working there? Is he running a doctor's office or a voodoo center? I had planned on writing a letter way back when about the awful acupuncturist but never did. Now I think it's time. Wow, I'm all worked up now!

  6. Oh, and BTW, when I was "breaking up" with Dr. Kreiner and told him I was going to Cornell, he told me that I was one of the most upbeat and positive patients he had ever had. Well that positivity really f'in worked in my favor, huh?

  7. she's not a vet. obviously. ivf worked for her. yay.

    i\'d like to know what she'd be writing if ivf hadn't worked for her, ever. or adoption or anything else.

  8. oh, beotch has comments on moderation, so i'm sure my comment won't get approved.

  9. Shoot- mine too!!

    Well, here it is in case anyone is interested (but I really want it out THERE!)

    Do I think positive thinking is important? Of course. Do I think positive thinking cures infertility? I’m sorry, no. I agree with Dawn, above, that we can control our reaction to the circumstances that arise in our lives, but I do not believe that we achieve our wants and desires simply by “wanting and desiring” them. I was a patient of Dr. Kreiner’s several years ago. At the time I was in my early 30’s, healthy in every way, and had a fantastically positive attitude. I believed IVF would work for me. I really did. Unfortunately, it never did. Over 5 years I’ve seen three different specialists and I’m simply unable to conceive. When I last met with Dr. Kreiner, he told me that I was one of the most “positive” patients he had. That positivity did not get me the child I desired though. My husband and I are in the process of adopting now and I truly believe that I WILL have the family that I always wanted. But that family is not coming from years of dreaming and wanting and hoping… It is coming from saving money, researching, planning, and MAKING it happen. I want to say, too, that the whole “if you relax, if you think positively, if you want it bad enough it will happen” mentality is very hurtful and insulting to those of us who have not found and will never find success in achieving pregnancy. Please think of that before you feed those lines to your fragile patients.

  10. Oooh, good one. I'm working on mine.

  11. Here's something from the website of the "place of worship" where the "fertility advocate" worships:

    Ask your heart what it really, really wants.
    Then write it down & slip it into our Prayer Chest on Sunday.
    We'll pray on it for 30 days.

    You got to be f'ing kidding me.

  12. Here\'s something from the website of the "place of worship" where the "fertility advocate" worships: Ask your heart what it really, really wants. Then write it down & slip it into our Prayer Chest on Sunday. We'll pray on it for 30 days.You got to be f'ing kidding me.

    30 whole days of prayer for anything my heart really, really wants?

    Awesome!!

    I'm going to write down (and slip into the Prayer Chest) that my heart really, really wants her website burnt down.

    (I'm also envisioning that this will happen in a positive, secret-like way)

    So I'm sure it will happen.

  13. W T F !!!!!

  14. I decided I'm going to start praying for a smaller waist and bigger chest while I'm at it. I wonder if that church takes email prayer requests.

  15. I decided I'm going to start praying for a smaller waist and bigger chest while I'm at it. I wonder if that church takes email prayer requests.

    Don\'t forget the $10 million!! Then you can buy the waist and chest.

  16. My grandmother had her whole church prayer circle praying for Mr. Drool Over and that didn't work either.

    Is there something a bit blasphemous about praying your granddaughter can get laid?

  17. *flashback* I am sitting on the sofa. Drinking red wine. Very tipsy. The meditation CDs are in my bedside drawer. Tiny red lanterns on each side of the headboard. A picture of a baby in a metal frame in my child corner, along with a onesie and a figurine of an elephant with its trunk facing downward. I am playing the DVD of The Secret for the umpteenth time because I am about to start my (da-DUM) first IVF cycle. I sip my wine and begin to weep as I watch, because I KNOW ("Ah know, like ah know, lahk ah KNOW") this time it's going to work.

    WTF ever.

    I\'ve had a lot of amazing things happen to me in my life because I believed they were possible. They also all happened to be in my control, unlike the genetic makeup of the few eggs remaining in my aging ovaries.

    This shite works for people who have never really had to face anything truly difficult. They need a little mental feel-good to keep themselves going until it works out, because it will, because they are in the 98% of people for whom it will work eventually if they just tough it out long enough.

    My therapist said to me the other day that only true grown-ups can admit that sometimes you just aren't going to get what you want. We pretty much agreed that we live in an entire world of children.

    Thing is, children have their own internal logic. Kind of like when I was seven and fought tooth and nail with a classmate who told me there was no Santa Claus. He said he'd *seen* his parents filling the stockings. I told him that was because his parents knew he'd been bad and wasn't going to get anything from Santa, so they felt sorry for him and filled it themselves. I was absolutely POSITIVE I was right. You just can't argue with these people.

    Geez, I'm morose tonight. Sorry. Basically agree with all of you. The fact that this woman is in a position of responsibility for women struggling with infertility is absolutely frightening.

  18. This woman is the founder of the AFA and currently she is the "patient education director" of East Coast Fertility!

    That is truly, truly frightening.

  19. Is there something a bit blasphemous about praying your granddaughter can get laid?

    OMG. lmao. thanks EQ I REALLY needed a smile today.

  20. Is there something a bit blasphemous about praying your granddaughter can get laid?

    Only if you yell "Oh God oh God oh God" when it happens...

  21. oh my god, i think most of the comments were approved.

    EQ, I LOVE you, I think that was you who said what i wanted to say only much much better

  22. Well let's see what she ends up saying about the comments...

  23. Wow - that is the worst...sometimes, not always, but sometimes, I feel like women who've done one IVF and exyoungihmienced immediate success can be the most clueless about the pain of repeated failure. They misguidedly believe that they know exactly how terrible infertility is...and, it is true on some level, but they are often blind to how much worse it can be -- the black hole that repeated failures can burn in your soul -- and they write shiite like this.

  24. why am I reading this cr@p?

  25. They misguidedly believe that they know exactly how terrible infertility is...and, it is true on some level, but they are often blind to how much worse it can be -- the black hole that repeated failures can burn in your soul -- and they write shiite like this.

    that is very very true I think.

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