Anyone trying again want to be treated "normal" m/c and live child ment.

(5 posts)(3 voices)
  1. My dh and I lost our twin girls April 28th due to incomplete hearts on both from late splitting to form ID twins. We are planning to do an FET in October. I told him yesterday that if our FET works I want to talk my RE and OB into treating me like a "normal" pregnancy. I want 1 beta and then an u/s at 6 weeks. No more repeat beta's every 2 days. With this last pregnancy I had 5 betas. My numbers were not rising fast enough for my RE so he kept ordering them repeated and I think the stress was to much. With my pregnancy with my dd now 7 I had one blood test and then an u/s at like 5.5 weeks to confirm. Granted I got pregnant on my own (she calles herself mommys one good egg LOL) but why should an IVF fresh or FET be treated differnt. I am fine having my progesterone checked but why the multiple betas? If its not doubling or if it falls what on earth can they do about it? NOTHING? So why stress out about it? Anyone else out there tired of the hoops we have to jump through when it comes to IVF pregnancy vrs natural?

  2. Tinkerbell - I was like this. Only I took it one step further. Prior to even having experienced a m/c (after my late loss) I refused an ultrasound until 8 weeks (I wanted 9 but my RE negotiated to 8).

    After my m/c I once again pushed to not have an u/s until 9 weeks but again the RE convinced me that 8 would be ideal (keeping in mind our m/c we saw a h/b at 8 and nothing at 10 - I wanted to avoid that at all costs). I'm sure they wanted 8 because once the h/b is identified it goes on their stats as a viable pg.

    I was like you. The way I saw it nothing could be done that early if it was a m/c and from our late loss any u/s we had associated with a pg always resulted in mild panic attacks 2 days prior to a scheduled u/s. I wanted to avoid that 2 days of panic as much as possible.

    Even though I'm considered high risk due to our late loss, I'm also adamant with my doc that unless something is OBVIOUS (as our complications were previously) I do NOT want any monitoring above and beyond what a normal pg women would have received (unless I happen to have a spur of the moment panic attack - then of course any reassurance does help).

    For me, having 'too much' medical attention fed into the perception that something was 'bound to be wrong so we should be on alert for it'. I was already on alert with low expectations of a successful pregnancy. I didn't need my medical doctor to further support my fears.

  3. I agree. I had a total of 3 betas. The first 3 days apart and the third a week later. There was no point for the third one because the first 2 were great. Luckily I didn't ask what the 3rd number was - I didn't see a point to it. But I feel now like what is the point of going through all these betas and u/s when they don't mean a thing. I had excellent betas. 14 dpo was 131, 17dpo was 665, and like I said I don't know what the 24dpo one was. Our u/s at 6w5d was also excellent. My RE told me that I had less then 5% chance of m/c, so you can imagine my surprise at our next u/s 2 weeks later (which was suppose to be our last appt with the RE before being discharged to the ob) and finding out our baby had died shortly after the first u/s. Sometimes I wonder if the first u/s killed the baby because it was doing so good before that. Sometimes I wish I never had that u/s or betas because it just gave me false hope and made it harder for me to accept a pregnancy that was going so well could suddenly be nonviable.

  4. I had excellent betas.

    bakar - my initial reasoning didn't even take into consideration my beta levels but now that you pointed it out, my beta with my m/c was higher than my healthy twin beta (125 and 92 respectively) - even though we lost the twins late, they were both very healthy embryos.

    Beta levels are crap!! I too learned that the hard way (putting to much 'trust' into something that means nothing) so doing betas in the future only helps the RE statistically. They really do nothing for me the expectant parent.

  5. Thanks girls. Glad to see I am not crazy. I was remembering my pregnancy with my daughter and realized something. One night I started having serious chest pains. I have a mild heart thing with a valve or something (yep its that big a deal I don't know the name LOL) so I was taken to the hospital. They did an ekg and it was normal so they wanted to do a chest xray. They asked if there was a chance I was pregnant so I said I guess a small one because we were activly ttc at the time. This is before we knew about our IF and remember when ttc was fun???? So they ran a blood test. That is the only reason I had a beta done. When it came back positive I was sent to my ob who did a urine test. So if it had not been for the trip to the er I wouldn't have had one in the first place. I am just so sick of the extra added stress. Like IVF isn't stressful enough.

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