anyone dealing w/ bfn on a DE cycle? want to commiserate?

(16 posts)(5 voices)
  1. I'm just coming off of my wonderful DE cycle w/ perfect 5 day grade 3A embies that went into my perfect triple stripe 10mm+ lining that were fertilized for the first time without ICSI with nothing to show for it. Oh and my donor was proven multiple times. And my RE has like a 70% success rate on DE cycles.

    Not sure what to do next and I'm waiting for RE to get back to me. I'm thinking he needs to stick that scope up there and take a good look around and get some genetic testing done on dh.

    Anyone else out there feeling miserable, stunned, dazed or whatever?

  2. My BFN wasn't DE, but I just wanted to say I'm sorry. It seems like sometimes there just aren't any answers, or any reason and it's just not fair. Take care of yourself.

  3. Thank you for your reply. I hope you're doing OK too. Take care.

  4. Oh seiferbrix, I'm so sorry to hear that! Do you have any frosties you could use? I would be very interested to see what Dr. W has to say. I was so hoping this would work for you after all you've been through to even get here.


  5. seiferbrix -
    I am so sorry to read your post - I hope you are doing better. I am awaiting my beta call from my RE from my first DE cycle. Unless he tells me a miracle has occurred I know it is a negative. I POAS yesterday and it was stark white. I;ve been crampy and spotting for a few days. I thought the hard part was in giving up the genetic connection and going with DE - but that doesn't compare to what this feels like. I bought into the idea that doing DE, while not a guarantee, certainly gave us great odds - why oh why do I once again fall into the negative statistic!?!? Can you do an FET?? We will likely try it but it is hard to feel even remotely optimistic about it after failing on a fresh cycle.
    If you would like to chat more - send me a PM.

    Take care of yourself - no one deserves this kind of pain and anguish.

  6. None of us deserve this pain and anguish! Katerina_A I'm so sorry too. I know exactly how you feel. We know that not all DE cycles work, but somehow we feel we won't be on THAT side of the stats.

    frahmeh, I do have 4 frosties left. Had 8 after transferring 2, but 4 arrested. Dr. W suggested sperm dna fragmentation testing. Bill had mentioned before he didn't like the test, but don't know why. I was hoping for a call back this week from him, but I guess I'll have to harass him next week. I don't want to attempt an FET until more testing is done.

    You know sometimes I still feel like this is a dream and I just shake my head and say this didn't happen. I mean everything was textbook perfect.

  7. Hi seiferbrix,

    I can't even imagine! What a nightmare! You know, the thing that comes to mind to me is since you had 8 left after transfer and 4 arrested - could the two that got put back have arrested as well? Maybe the 4 that are left are good strong embies since they didn't arrest. That is one of the reasons we moved on to DE was because my embryo had fractured and we knew it was poor quality eggs (it fractured before it was put back - different RE). Dr. W saw this and then suggested DE between that and the high FSH. Since you were using DE and you had half of them arrest, I would defininitely be looking at DH's boys. It might be worth a try to transfer the frosties since they didn't arrest (there is one girl on the boards that did get pg with a DE frostie transfer from Dr. W). The other thing I would consider is DE/DS if DH would be willing - that would eliminate the male factor too. Dr. W does have donor embryo's as well or you could pick the DS. Just a couple of thoughts for you.

    I pray that between Dr. W and Bill, they find a way to help you fulfill your dreams.


  8. frahmeh,
    I hope they can work their magic w/ me! The two he put back were the fastest growing ones at that time. They were grade 3A which is great. I don't want to do anything until we have more testing done. I honestly believe one or both implanted as I had spotting 2 days after transfer then no spotting at all. I think they too stopped developing. I'm really OK w/ DE/DS at this point.

    Any official word yet? If it's as you suspect I'm here for you.

  9. Hi seiferbrix -
    Sorry that you are going through more cr-p - I hope you get some answers so that you can figure out your next step. My husband had the sperm framentation test done a while back at the recommendation of our RE but I know from others that many REs see little to no value in it. I guess it all depends on who you ask.

    AFM - my beta yesterday was a 7.2 - I know that it is a chemical pregnancy but I am staying on my meds until another beta tomorrow. I hate that I am just delaying the inevitable and have to go through the whole beta h-ll again. The hardest part at this point is that that crappy beta gave my DH hope. He just doesn't understand the realities - and he wants me to be positive until we get confirmation - I just can't muster any hope just to have it dashed again. IF sucks royally - I can't help but ask why us?? We would be awesome parents but yet we are denied and than there are freaks that get to have 14 kids - it just makes me so angry, frustrated and hurt. Sorry for the rant.

  10. Katerina_A,
    Sorry for the hell you're going thru and then to have to be the voice of reason to your dh is hard too. Did you get the result today or do you have to wait till tomorrow?

  11. Hey seiferbrix -
    The torture continues - the lab's machine was broken today and we didn't get the results until 4:30 - ugh! My second beta was 23 (1st was 7.2) - I know that it more than doubled but I also know that it is just too late in the game for this to be viable. But we will continue on and go for another one on Tuesday.
    How are you doing?

  12. Yes total torture for you. Is your dh driving you more crazy w/ this doubling?

    I\'ve had a busy weekend doing the DIY thing (replaced a door). Good for keeping the brain occupied. I only dwelled on my misery about 10 times instead of about every hour.

  13. seiferbrix - Sorry for your BFN. I had a failed DE cycle in January, we had two frozen and right now I'm 7dp5dt from the FET of both. I know it's negative. This is my fifth transfer and I've only had one chemical, this feels like all the other negatives.

    It was hard enough to come terms that I needed DE at age 35 after 5 years TTC #1, but now this is failing too, I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm so sad.

  14. Lizzy I'm so sorry. I feel your pain and sadness in your post. We're all in that "what the heck do I do now" place. It's so hard when you feel that DE is the magic bullet and then it doesn't work either.
    For me we're exploring the male side of things and then go from there.

  15. seiferbrix - I think we are going to do genetic testing on my DH next and maybe more in-depth sperm analysis, although everything seems to be fine with him. Do you know what testing you will pursue? Have you had a uterine biopsy or other testing done? I had the biopsy and a hystereoscopy last month, but I can't help but think if maybe the problem is that I can't carry a's just so difficult not knowing what's causing this.

  16. I want to have a hysteroscopy just for my peace of mind. All saline sonos and hsg's have been normal.
    I want to pursue having a karyotype done on dh and then go from there.

RSS feed for this topic


You must log in to post.