Am I crazy to try again? On the way to IVF#5 at 43

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  • Started by lagaluga1987 ago.
  • Latest reply from lagaluga1987.
  1. I am about to start IVF #5. I wonder how many times I can go through this torture. Will I EVER succeed or am I crazy to keep trying at 43 y.o. ?

    Please share some success stories if you are over 40 and had multiple failures and then succeeded with your own eggs. I NEED motivation because DONOR egg is NOT an option for me, I am NOT interested.

    I would also like to vent and chat w/other ladies in similar situations, (not giving up after mulitiple failures) and hopefully we can get lucky for once!!!!

    Hoping to receive and give some support. Thanks

  2. Hi Baby, I say GO FOR IT!

    I am currently 23wks pg from my 5th IVF which I did at age 43 with my own eggs. Everything looks great for a healthy baby. I've even been released from the peri because everything looks so normal. I'll be 44 when the baby is born.

    A lot of people on these boards have nasty, discouraging things to say about women our age who keep trying with our own eggs. I try very hard to avoid those threads. I'm with you. DE was not an option for me.

    We were told, very bluntly, by one RE that I would never be able to carry a baby and that our only option was a surrogate. We still have six frozen embryos (with 41 yo eggs) that we reserved in case we did have to use a GC. This was our last hoorah and we went to Cornell for one more fresh cycle. I had a lot of bleeding in the first few weeks, but since then every week we've been amazed that another week has gone by with no problems.

    Incredibly, I plan to go back next year and have my frozens transferred. Before we did our first cycle, we committed to not leave any embryos banked.

  3. I am also about to embark on IVF #5 at 42. I know all you are going through. Donor egg is also not an option for us. Please feel free to email me anytime. Good luck to you.

  4. Hello Baby,
    i am with you, in fact I am following you from the vet board to here! We are definitely in the same boat. I am not here to share some success stories with you since we have none yet. But I am here to offer you support and definitely understand where you are coming from.

    I am 41, just had a cancelled 4th cycle last month due to poor response. I never had a Myrto in all my tries, although I have a daughter who is 15 yo from a previous relationship. Me and my husband have been trying for 5 years but we have not been successful yet. I have history of blocked tubes which were removed and my dx now is poor responder, probably due to my age.

    Like you, DE is not an option for me, although I've been given a DE talk since my 3rd tries but we kept on using my eggs although we kind of knew the odds. Am I crazy? I definitely am. I just dont want to give that little hope up.

    Before the 4th cycle, I was determined its going to be our last (dh agreed with me), since we dont have the time, energy and money to do this again. But now, I cant shake the feeling in my heart that I want to keep trying. I feel like I am addicted to ivf, I just want to keep trying and not giving up.

    When are you going to start your ivf #5? I wished i could start right away but due to financial problem, we couldnt until about next year. But I will be back to check on you and be your buddy to cheer you on if you want .

    Manthos

  5. misssunny, talk about inspiration, you just blew my mind! I am so thrilled for you. Can I ask what protocol you used and how many eggs/fertilized, day of transfer, how many, etc? Did you have an elevated FSH?
    I am so glad you proved the dr. wrong that said you couldn't do it, YAY for you!

    Butterflies, Maybe we can both get lucky this time around, I hope to see good things for you, when do you start?

  6. Manthos, I think we posted at the same time! Thanks for your post and encouragement, and I'm grateful you have offered your support, I'd like to do the same for you.
    I will be starting stims this weekend as soon as AF gets here, probably tomorrow.
    My DH has had enough, I think this is my last try w/him on board and truth be told, I'm not ready to give up, if it doesn't work this time, I'm trying again, so hopefully I won't have to worry about what's next and #5 will be the one.
    This has been MY dream, and he's just fed up. It's all he hears about every single day, guess I'm obsessed too.
    We all deserve to be moms and I pray that our struggles will finally be met with our dreams coming true.

  7. Baby - I am supposed to start Aug/Sept. When are you starting? I will keep you in my thoughts.

  8. Not an option for us either. I am almost 41 and have had two trisomy losses in the past 1 1/2 yrs and I am going to keep plugging away. I know I have to have a good one in there. And even more foolish bc my DH said no way to anymore IVF's, I plan on trying the old fashioned way. RE said I don't have a chance in h*ll, but we will just see about that.

    Manthos - My DH and I have not had any success yet either and I have a 13 y/o from my previous marriage, I wish you all the best of luck!

    Miss sunny you are an inspiration to me as well, my DH goes to Dr. Schlegel at Cornell, but my Cornell cycle was a bust. I would have loved to have had frozens left over but none made it.

    We can do it!

    ~Matty

  9. I'm so glad to have found this thread. We're probably starting a fresh cycle in October, and I'll be 43 in November. I just had a MC from a fresh cycle, and a failed FET in February. However, we have a 15 month old healthy girl from a fresh cycle when I was 41 (I hope I'm allowed to mention that here without upsetting someone).

    Anyway, there's just that drive inside, something that just keeps me/us going, even though it feels like hell when you're going through it. At the time of the MC a few weeks ago, the thought of doing another fresh cycle made me feel physically ill, but now that I've had a little time to move on, I feel like I just cannot give up. We all know our chances are slim, but we also know that it can happen, so why not try if we are not ready to give up, as long as we don't have unrealistic expectations?

    I'm amazed by these inspirational stories/thoughts, and I wish you all the best. I wish you weren't going through this, but still, it's nice to know one is not alone.

  10. As much as I am sad to see others in my situation, I am glad that we have found each other for support. I wasn't sure I should even start the thread, I thought that people would just think I was crazy and wasting my time to not give up already, but I have more hope than I did yesterday.

    phlomis, I am soooooo sorry about your recent loss, I cannot imagine how you feel. I have NEVER been pregnant yet, and I don't know how I would survive a loss, not getting pregnant is horrible enough. I am glad that you have your 15 month old girl, and hopefully you will be able to give her a sibling soon.

    Matty, I am very sorry for your losses also, so disappointing and you have the strength and courage to continue the fight!!!! You too are an inspiration

    Here's hoping we all get to see each other through this gut renching struggle and ride off into the sunset with our little miracles.

  11. Baby,
    good luck with stims this weekend, hope AF will be nice and early, coz waiting sucks . What protocols are you in? Wish you all the best!

    salapataras,
    wow.. definitely an inspiration for all of us, older women. Very exciting, I know we all can do it. In fact I have a cousin who is 45 and just given birth to a healthy baby girl last year. That also made me determine to do this again.

    Matty,
    good luck doing the old fashioned way. Hope you will be successful, you never know. I wish we could do that too, not a chance I am afraid since I dont have my tubes, and give a sibling to my daughter, she kept on asking us for a little brother and sister, and broke my heart every time.

    Yes, we can do it girls.

    Manthos

  12. sadkiab - i'll be 42 in September and recently completed a cycle at CCRM with Dr. Schoolcraft. I've also had multiple miscarriages due to chromosomal abnormalities. My bet is given your age and m/c history he will suggest genetic testing. We did the polor body biospy testing, which means they tested all 23 pairs of chromosomes of my eggs. This requires freezing the embroys at day 2 becuase the test results take about 6 weeks. It's quite a bit more expensive them my last local cycle, but so far my embroys have been much better quality than my local cycle. CCRM is really known for thier great lab. Let's just hope we have some normals in the bunch. We should hear back soon. Good luck ladies....it's not easy. As i type this my husband is telling me he just paid the credit card with our last cycle. Lovely...but i'm with many of you...i'm not done trying yet!!!

  13. lagaluga1987, thank you so much for starting this thread. You are not crazy. I am 43.7 and planning on IVF#3. DE is not an option for me until I have exhausted all possibilities.

    My history - I have done at least 12+ IUI's (lost count so many) and 2 IVF cycles. I was successful on my first IUI attempt at 39, and have my now 4 yr old DS (born at 30 weeks). That gave me optimism that I could conceive with just IUIs - until last year at age 42, when I decided I needed IVF. Both IVF's ended in m/c at about 6 weeks. My first m/c from an IUI showed normal chromosomes, my second m/c from IVF#1 was due to trisomy on chrom 2, the last m/c frim IVF#2 was spontaneous so we don't know. We had an immunology workup done and found elevated NK cells. So I will need to treat it with intralipids a week before retrieval.

    I'm still researching clinics and would love to cycle at CCRM. I have a phone consultation set up with Dr. S in August, and I'm working on a budget to see how much more it will cost to cycle at CCRM than locally, and then plan to present it to DH. He has already said we can't travel to Denver, but I am hoping after the phone consultation he will change his mind. I feel like if this is my last try, I want to do everthing right. I'm starting my supplements (pycnogenol, CQ10, resversatol, considering DHEA), I'm doing some light exercise, and trying to eat healthy.

    I believe that 43-44 year olds can conceive, it's just a matter of finding that good egg (i.e. multiple IVF cycles), having the right protocol and using a good lab (where the culture in the petrie dish is gentle with our fragile eggs).

  14. There's an RE in California, his name is Richard Paulson, he got a 63-year old woman pregant with IVF. So from my perspective, you can do anything you want and it's noone else's business. That's my perspective.

    sadkiab - i'll be 42 in September and recently completed a cycle at CCRM with Dr. Schoolcraft. I've also had multiple miscarriages due to chromosomal abnormalities. My bet is given your age and m/c history he will suggest genetic testing. We did the polor body biospy testing, which means they tested all 23 pairs of chromosomes of my eggs. This requires freezing the embroys at day 2 becuase the test results take about 6 weeks. It's quite a bit more expensive them my last local cycle, but so far my embroys have been much better quality than my local cycle. CCRM is really known for thier great lab. Let's just hope we have some normals in the bunch. We should hear back soon. Good luck ladies....it's not easy. As i type this my husband is telling me he just paid the credit card with our last cycle. Lovely...but i'm with many of you...i'm not done trying yet!!!

  15. If I could go back in time, I would have gone to CCRM right out of the gate when my DH was dx'd with 1-2% morph and low counts; (and I was 37). Neither one of us could accept his dx or that we really needed IVF/ICSI. I also did 12 IUI's most of them un-medicated and an un-medicated one worked, but we lost that pg last February (trisomy 21 pg lost in the 15th week). We had a chemical pg on a break cycle 2 yrs ago, and we just got pg naturally this past May but lost that baby at 9 weeks to Trisomy 22. A-hole nurse that called with my pathology report said, hey going for Trisomy 23 next. I SAID NO DUMB-A$$!

    I have done 2 IVF's (BFN) and not one of my ART cycles has resulted in anything BUT BFN. My DH and I have been pg 3 times in 3 1/2 yrs only naturally so I don't really know what that means? My FSH is 5.1/I ovulated every 28 days, over stim every time I take the FSH. I think my best bet at this point is just keep on keeping on with BD. Canceling my cycles for overstimming is wasting more time than doing the dang BD.

    I saw a great doctor in NYC, Dr. Sami David, he said I would never become pg medicated, and to keep BDing and hope I get lucky. That is what I am hoping for. I will not give up hope that us 40's can get it done one way or the other. If I wasn't out of money, insurance and my DH hadn't banned me from more ART, I would be at CCRM right now. So, I have to just BD and *ugh* get thru it and pray for a miracle.

    ~Matty

  16. There\'s an RE in California, his name is Richard Paulson, he got a 63-year old woman pregant with IVF. So from my perspective, you can do anything you want and it's noone else's business. That's my perspective.

    It must be donor egg.

  17. Manthos, thanks for the push, AF is here. I am on EPP and using Saizen growth hormone. I went in for BW/US today on day 1 to avoid going into NYC tomrw. My stims will start on Sunday, HERE WE GO AGAIN!!!!!!!

    sadkiab, I'm so glad you joined us but sorry to hear about your history and losses. Maybe CCRM will work your magic. Where do you live/cycle? You are only one month older than me Maybe we can have our beans at 44 together?

    danfisch, I hope you get your results soon and hope more to hear good news for you.

    ecocity, that is amazing, but it definitely wasn't her eggs.

    Matty, what clinic is Dr. David with?

    So what state does everyone live in?

  18. Good luck Baby.

    I am in NY.

  19. MISS SUNNY- CONGRATS!!! What was your protocol?
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  20. samidavid.com

    This is Dr. David's website. He is very big into nutrition, vitamins, accu, he tests for almost every thing, which we did. Sadly, our issues are just AMA which we cannot get around, it is what it is. I am almost 41 and my DH has 24% DNA damage (via the SCSA) and 1-2% morphology/low count, low motility. I know our odds are dismal but with open tubes, a uterus, an old egg and a few sperm ya never know. Praying for a miracle is my only hope. My DH and I agreed our last IVF in January was it. And he is done with the topic. He would like a child, but he is DONE with trying for one with the RE.

    I am in CT.

    A 63 yr old had a baby, OMG, my Mom is 62!

  21. danfisch - I'm keeping my fingers crossed that you have some normals from the PBB testing. I've seen from so many posts here that embryos were better quality from cycling at CCRM than local. It has to be some secret formula in the lab culture/ petrie dish. How did your protocol differ at CCRM versus local?

    lagaluga1987 - I live in Dallas, TX, and have cycled with two different doctors. One was at the Presbyterian Plano ARTS lab and the other at Presbyterian Dallas ARTS labs. They are good labs, but I would really like to go to CCRM for my last try. Have you used the EPP and using Saizen protocol before? I'm interested in that for my last cycle, and have that on my list of things to ask about during my CCRM consultation. I don't expect to start my cycle until September.

  22. It's been quiet the last few days. Today is Day 3 of stims for me, can't wait until Thursday for my US and BW to see what's going on. How is everyone else doing?

  23. butterflies, thanks for the good luck wishes, and I will be doing the same for you in a couple of weeks!!!

    Matty, thanks for the interesting info. I hope that you get lucky w/o the help of the RE, much stranger things have happened, right?

    sadkiab, if you can go to CCRM, I would give it a shot. Their results are some of the top in the country, and their lab is surely cutting edge.
    I did EPP w/Saizen last cycle and produced the most eggs to date, but still BFN. We are trying the same protocol again this time. Hopefully I will have better news for you next month, I hope, I hope.

    Well my first shot is tomorrow morning, it is starting to feel very real again, probably moreso after the shot

    I am so glad to have you ladies to share #5 with, perhaps we can all bring each other some new good luck

  24. It\'s been quiet the last few days. Today is Day 3 of stims for me, can't wait until Thursday for my US and BW to see what's going on. How is everyone else doing?

    Baby - All the best of luck to you! Keep us posted.

  25. for those who had BFP, can you please share clinic/ doc?
    how many tries to reach it?

    Thank you

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